The Loaded Truth Behind Mommy Wine Culture
[gifted] Thanks to Smith Publicity for sending me this free copy! All thoughts and opinions are my own.
Alcohol isn’t going to fix the systemic lack of support for mothers–and pretending it’s the solution to surviving motherhood does more harm than good.
A wine glass etched with “Mommy needs wine”; a T-shirt that says, “I wine because my kids whine”; a onesie proclaiming, “I’m the reason mommy drinks.” This is Mommy Wine Culture: the pervasive message that alcohol helps us survive motherhood. But according to writer and mother Celeste Yvonne, it’s a symptom of a much larger issue: the mental load of motherhood, a burden born from outdated family norms, traditional roles, and a systemic lack of support for moms–all of which impact our mental health.
In this refreshing, honest take on some of the most pressing concerns for twenty-first-century parents, Yvonne mixes research, cultural references, her own story, and engaging interviews with other moms who sought refuge in wine and found a way out. Drinking to blur the tumultuous days of parenting is a catch-22: it actually keeps us from being present during this precious time. It’s Not about the Wine pulls back the veil on what’s really plaguing mothers, offers tangible tips for how to lighten your mental load, and paves a path forward for all of us who want to survive and thrive during these weary and wonderful years. From advice on talking about your mental load with your partner, to curating the media we consume and the company we keep, to deep reflections about how we use alcohol to manage burnout and stress, Yvonne helps us recognize the messaging of Mommy Wine Culture for what it is: a distraction from what we really need. If you are worn out and looking to evaluate your relationship to alcohol and motherhood, It’s Not about the Wine is an invaluable companion.
Via Amazon.ca
This might seem a bit out of the norm of my usual reading taste but it’s not!! This book is a good merge of Mom support and the methods we fall to for coping with the stress and pressures of motherhood. Overall this was an enjoyable and informative read. I didn’t agree with everything that she wrote and talked about but it didn’t detract from the main meat of the book.
I liked that she had lots of anecdotal stories to relate to, which also made the reading flow nice and easy. She included some statistics, but if you’re looking for a more factual read then hitting up This Naked Mind would be the way to go.
For some background, I have been sober for at least ten years. I partied hard in college, but really didn’t and don’t enjoy the taste of alcohol so I just decided it wasn’t worth it. It wasn’t worth the hangover or the cost, and I didn’t like how it made me feel. So I just stopped. I wasn’t an avid drinker anyway, but I was drinking when I first started seeing Andrew. It was the wildest thing (which I do talk about in my review of This Naked Mind) seeing how people value alcohol in society and a friend group. This takes it one step further and applies it to the Mom-sphere.
All the memes and subliminal messaging about how Mom needs wine (or alcohol) to function.
To be better moms. To get through the day. And the fact that there’s no shame in needing a little glass of wine at the end of a long day. And of course, there isn’t. But as with all things, but especially alcohol it’s a slippery slope. When one glass of wine, turns into two, turns into a bottle, turns into a problem.
It definitely comes down to a way deeper problem that’s inherent in our society that’s probably even deeper than the fact that society doesn’t support Moms after the baby is born. But that’s another rant for another day. But it does come down to (I think) people unable to deal with their lives so they turn to a substance to make them feel better. And then they either get attached to the high or the numb and then the fallout of the overwhelming emotions comes back and they spiral again. It’s a vicious cycle.
But that’s definitely off-topic for this review. I think that this book is fine to read even if you aren’t a mom because it tackles more of the inherent women pressures, as well as the overwhelming social media on both spectrums. I would definitely recommend it if you are feeling ‘sober curious’.
This book is available today on Amazon or your local bookstore. Connect with Celeste Yvonne on her website, Facebook, or Instagram!
Let me know if you read it! And if you want to discuss the sober life, I’m always willing to talk.
J x
